Plum in Grand Company

By Ben Jenson

My wife, Pauline, discovered this little gem in Ludwig Bemelman's fictional memoir of his time in Hollywood, Dirty Eddie (Viking, 1947). The scene is a dinner party in Malibu given in the 1930s for old and distinguished actors and actresses, including a Sir Gerald Graveline:

"But there," said the lieutenant, with raised voice, and holding his glass in the direction of Sir Gerald, "is the man who should play the lead, not--what's his name?"

"Thank you. Thank you very much, dear boy," said Sir Gerald, "but there are three roles in the world that I do not care to play. They are, in fact, not playable. They are: Christ, Shakespeare, and Jeeves. You start with six strikes against you when you try to portray any of them."

Pace, Arthur Treacher and Stephen Fry.